work in progress

One of the things I look forward to for when I am old, is to insist that something obviously untrue, is true. And be absolutely consistent about it. Repeat. Again and again. To people whom you know have heard it a few dozen times before. It's a shame I can't do it now cos I think you can only get away with it when you are certifiably old, otherwise you'd just get punched regularly.

My dad has been telling everyone that he's had a stroke, even to me, who was there with him at the hospital and read all the doctor's reports. What he had was Bell's Palsy, which the doctor has explained to him five times and me explained to him for the tenth gazillionth time No dad, it's NOT a fucking stroke you had, you did NOT have a stroke, it's called BELL'S PALSY it's caused by a viral infection not your tubes busting up in your brain! STOP SAYING YOU HAD A STROKE! He would go (after me yelling at him for 15 mins), ...er.... yeah... palsy... same family as strokes....hehheh...

At this point I either have to walk off or slam down the phone to prevent me from having a bleeding stroke.

My dad's eldest sister, who is about 80, has on every occasion that we meet, been insisting that I am "not too old" to try for a baby girl. She has even called me up, to tell me that. If she was 5 years younger, and unrelated to me, I would tell her to try for one herself.

I've only got three so far, for when my turn come:

1. Leonardo Capricio is a hunk; I did and still dribble over him

2. I suffer from terminal piles and can't sit down for more than two minutes at a time

3. Hong Kong summers are getting cooler every year, which is annoying.


Not as good as insisting you've had a stroke, I know... But I'm working on it. (It's not as easy as it seems)